Is a Kiss Just a Kiss?

Honestly I didn't see this coming. The irony is that it's on the heels of what I posted yesterday. This time it's regarding Barber - my 5 year old.

Inside his school folder there was an "FYI" stickie that informed me that he had to stay after gym class for a few minutes because the teacher had to talk to him about the "no kissing in school" policy.

Oh. My. Word.

Seriously?!? So guess who had the I know you are very caring and loving but you are not allowed to kiss anyone except your family (to which he began to list the family members) and eventually your wife talk? The difficulty is he doesn't get it. And really how should he - a 5 year old doesn't comprehend the intimacy of a kiss. He only knows that he is part of a family that gives and receives hugs and kisses. Thankfully what he does comprehend is that he needs to be obedient and there is no kissing anyone that is not family and that includes everyone from his school.

I'm thinking Daddy gets to reinforce this with Barber tonight.

School Visit Synopsis

Highlights of Parent's Day at the boys' school:

• Eating lunch in the cafeteria was...how to describe it...interesting? The seats are small and everyone wants to talk to you nullifying any quality time with Jeter and Barber. And yet, they are absolutely thrilled that you are there.
• Is it wrong/silly to feel totally flattered when two third grade girls come over to me, one twisting her hair around her finger and the other looking back and forth from the floor to me and then to the floor again while they banter "no you tell her" back and forth until finally one of them speaks up and says "Jeter's mom? We just wanted to tell you that we think you are really pretty". LOL. Is that what it would be like if I had a daughter?!?
• I was reminded once again how annoying book fair can be...although I was relieved to find a book that Jeter and I could both agree on. Barber's turn to go is tomorrow afternoon. Hoping for the same success.
• It's really nice when they have normal size chairs for us to sit on (in the classroom) for parent's day. That isn't always the case when I volunteer in the classroom throughout the rest of the year.
• I seriously believe that Simms is a kid magnet. Maybe that's why he has been such an awesome soccer coach for the 4/5 and 6/7 year olds? Barber's classmates didn't want him to leave and vied for his attention the entire time he was there!
• Confronted with the reality of my age when one of my former students was a substitute in the school today. At the same time it was enjoyable to observe her skill in teaching these kiddos and I was as proud of her as if she was my very own daughter!

Time...it's worth it.

Family traditions.

Jeter's class has been discussing family traditions. This past week they had to complete a project where each student is responsible for making a quilting square. The middle of the square was to display their family (via photo or drawing). The four corners were designated for traditions within your family. This week they are presenting their squares to the class and then together constructing a class quilt.

The four traditions that Jeter selected were:

• Birthdays. He highlighted that they always wake up to a room full of balloons, they get to choose two flavors for their homemade ice cream cake and then they get a special cake designed by mom for their birthday party with family and friends.
• New York Giants. Apparently the fact that we are all NYG fans and watch the games together (when it is on TV - excluding night games for the boys) is a tradition in his book.
• Christmas. He noted that our family celebrates the birth of Jesus Christ and that we spend time together decorating cookies and the tree.
• Fun Family Friday. This is a "new" tradition that was birthed this Fall. With the many scheduled evenings, we made sure to have a nice evening together on Fridays. Friday's are now characterized by enjoying pizza and ice cream sundaes as well as some fun activity together.

As parents, we often (at least Simms and I do) think about the big things that impact our children. At times this can eclipse the importance and relevance of the day-to-day stuff. Isn't it interesting that a larger percentage of what my son perceives as meaningful and important doesn't cost a ton of money? The cost is really time - to make things together, talk together and play together. Finally, Jeter summarized the importance of his family's traditions by stating that they create a strong family bond.

He may only be eight but I think he's on to something...

What is one of your family traditions?

Barber's First Day of School

Barber...it's your first day of school. Is that even possible? It seems like just yesterday you wrapped your fingers around one of mine, turned your head toward my voice and gave me a quiet smile or maybe even a coo.

Time has passed quickly - or at least it seems so. I've paused to wonder - did I do enough? Have I taught you all you need to know? Is your foundation strong enough? Did I mindlessly waste any opportunity to pour into you? Was I too busy with working on the house, volunteering at the school and church?

And then I remind myself that God gave you to me. He chose you to be my son and He knew what these last five years would hold. He knew the ups and downs we would walk through as a family and He gave us strength and endurance for each step on our journey.

There were no tears this morning. Only smiles as you confidently walked to the bus stop with your brother. Excitement oozed out of you as you talked about going to Kindergarten and contemplated what special you might have today - hoping that it was gym. The bus arrived and you were off - ready to sit in your seat. Smiles abounded as you signed "I love you" to me and Daddy and we returned the sign and blew kisses.

Yes. You are ready and prepared for this next season in life. Mommy and Daddy are not perfect but I know that you have a solid foundation. Our job isn't complete. There is still much to accomplish. There are still things to teach and sow and pour into your precious life.

Snacks to bake. Homework to oversee. Time to encourage. Prayers to pray. Activities to participate in.

I will not mourn what has passed but will treasure the memories. And with great expectation, jump into this new season of our lives together.

The Evolution of The Spotted-pillar

Have you not heard of The Spotted-pillar before? No worries - you wouldn't have unless you were able to read the mind of my 7 year old who concocted this wonderful insect. Here is what he has been busy creating for his school project this week. Wonder where he gets this talent from. He must have a good teacher. LOL. All joking aside, I am very proud of the work that he has done and I think he created a very yummy 3-D representation of his insect.

The plan...because you cannot create without first having a plan.

Reading the instructions.

Cracking the eggs. He was so excited to finally succeed in this task!

Coloring the icing - which he also made by himself.

The head has been iced. Now he is working on the thorax.

Finally tackling the abdomen.

The stripes are now added. He was getting really excited at this point.

Making the spots - which he determined was much easier than the stripes.

Spots are completed!

Adding the final touches...

I almost want to call the exterminator!

Can Anyone Tell Me Where to Find the Okra?

Labels.

They are useful for organization. I label folders and bins and storage containers. I'm even thankful that products are labeled. Can you imagine a spice cabinet without labels?

Labels are time-savers. Do you know how long it would take me to shop without labels? Too long. I like the fact that items are classified and labeled. I know that regardless of what supermarket I go into, if I find the dairy section, I will find milk. I also appreciate that I don't have to search through a bunch of baby dolls and diapers to find a basketball when I visit a toy store.

The only time that I thoroughly resist labels is when it comes to people.

When I meet someone, I don't want to know what so-and-so might have to tell me about that individual. I prefer to get to know them myself.

There are so many avenues I could take at this juncture but the one that is most relevant to my corner is in reference to my dear Jeter. Earlier this school year it was recommended that we apply to have him tested and considered for the gifted program. This really wasn't a surprise to us but I hesitated.

Why? I don't want my son labeled. I don't want others to judge him before they know him. I don't want him to be stereotyped or placed in a box. I can't really protect him from this. It happens everyday. The key is to teach him how to handle the effects of it - which requires a forgiving heart that surrenders daily to God. Ultimately, this will lead to a healthy mindset that I included in my 25 Random Things post when I stated, People don't scare me. Disobedience to God does. The process through which I learned this (at the age of 15) wasn't easy but it was worth it and has kept me focused the past 20+ years of my life. I just cannot believe that Jeter is already in process of learning this and he is only 7.

So...what did we do?

• Prayed and filled out the application.
• Prayed and mailed the application.
• Prayed and allowed them to test Jeter.
• Prayed and scheduled an appointment with the team of "experts".
• Prayed and both accepted and agreed with their recommendation for Jeter to participate in the gifted program.

Sidenote - this would help summarize why I haven't been blogging lately...lots of praying going on!

The result? He starts this week. I have complete peace that this is part of God's plan for his life right now. Does this mean a new label has been placed on Jeter? I guess in the eyes of others this is a real possibility, however he isn't any different to me today then he was yesterday. My greatest concern remains the same: seeking our Father for guidance and direction regarding parenting our boys and facilitating all that He has for them.

I still don't like labels...but I can't be afraid of them or let them control me.

He Just Makes Me Cry

This morning, while cleaning through the pile of papers that I've neglected the last two days, I came across an assignment that Jeter completed in school yesterday. They are obviously learning about Martin Luther King Jr. and his famous speech because the assignment was titled "I Have a Dream."

Jeter wrote:

I have a dream. My dream is that no one sins. I can help my dream come true by starting little and help my school. From there I'm going big.

I'm interested in asking him what he means by starting little and then going big. Meanwhile, tears well up in response to the heart of my son. He isn't perfect. None of us are. But he has a dream...

Warning: Missing: R's and L's.

I had to go to the dentist again yesterday. One of the last places I would go to on purpose but I had to get one last filling. My appointment was at 11:50 AM. I was out of there by 12:10 PM. I think that is the fastest I have ever had a bottom tooth filled. In the past I have been told that the bottom molars take longer because it takes about 20 minutes just to get numb. I thought he must have used some amazing new type of stuff because I was feeling numb - like right after he finished injecting it.

Here's the kicker though. The procedure (including the numbing) lasted a mere 20 minutes, however the effect of the novocaine didn't wear off until almost 5:00 PM! Yes, you read that correctly. So exactly HOW MUCH of that stuff did I get injected with? I don't know for sure but my hypothesis would be a whole heck of a lot.

My mind believed that the left side of my face was swollen. Does anyone else feel that way when they get novocaine? Touching it doesn't make me feel any differently. Only looking in a mirror would assure me that my face looked normal to everyone else.

My tongue was numb too. That effected my speech - meaning I totally sounded like I was still living in LI with a very thick accent. Why? Think about it. You need your tongue to properly pronounce your "r's" and "l's". Even though I still pronounce my vowels more like a LI gal than a Pennsylvanian - my accent isn't as obvious because I pronounce my "r's" and "l's". Needless to say, this was entertaining to my family. It became interesting when I went to volunteer at Jeter's school yesterday afternoon. I usually volunteer on Wednesday afternoons.

I was asked to call the children over, one at a time, and ask them to complete one of their December goals - to properly write their address. If I didn't think about it, when they arrived this is what I would have sounded like:

"Hewwo, awe yuh abuh to wite yuh fuwl addess fuh me?"

Thankfully I was thinking about it and it didn't sound quite that bad but there were a couple of children who looked perplexed and asked "what?" and I'm thinking Cut me some slack here. Your teacher already told you why I was calling you back here. But I would take a breathe and do my best to ask "Are you able to write your full address for me?" while smiling.

Thankful Statements

I'm Thankful

1. Why are you thankful for your family?
2. What are you thankful for on Thanksgiving Day?
3. What are you thankful for at school?
4. What else are you thankful for?

Jeter's answers:
1. I am thankful for my family because they love me.
2. I am thankful for my brother on Thanksgiving Day!
3. At school, I am thankful for my teacher.
4. I am also thankful for Jesus!

Can I just say "ditto"?

This was a fun activity that Jeter completed in school.

It's My Birthday!

Happy Birthday to me!

Thankfully my cold is gone so I can enjoy my day. My mom called me and invited me to lunch at their house. Yipee! Hopefully that means I will see Promises, Brady and Smiles too. I recently told someone that when I say my age (38) it sounds old to me but I don't necessarily feel old. Granted, I am not in the same shape I was as an 18 year old (if only!) but overall life is good.

I have been thinking about my life 20 years ago - my high school reunion is next weekend. I'm looking forward to it and yet, I cannot believe that much time has passed. That alone makes me feel old. There are a couple of friends I have remained in touch with but everyone else...not so much. Life happens. You go to college, move out of state, get married, have children and build new relationships.

We are blessed to be able to stay with my closest friend from SBS and I know we are going to get very little sleep - talking into the wee hours of the morning! But what other conversations will I have? Most likely I will overload on small talk - discussing the number of children you have, their ages, where you live, what you do... It's caused me to become a bit introspective this week. My Alma mater's motto is Character Before Career. I have always appreciated the meaning of this simple statement and pray that my life has and will continue to exemplify the value of these words.

Enough about that - I've got another week yet to prepare and decide on important things like what I am going to wear and how many pairs of shoes to pack . Thankfully I already know what I am wearing this weekend. It's my Birthday Weekend and even though technically this isn't really a birthday present, it's happening this weekend and therefore I've decided that it is part of my birthday celebration. Totally makes sense to me. Simms and I are going to see my beloved New York Giants this weekend with Say Anything and Stretch! We are playing the Redskins - I know Sandy will probably be watching the game. Never know - if you are watching, you just might see us!?! I will be wearing my Strahan Jersey - #92. Yes, I know that he is retired but I see nothing wrong with honoring an awesome NY Giant. Besides...it is my birthday!

Update: this morning, after being wished "Happy Birthday" by my boys, Barber asked me if I would be giving them presents today. I smiled and said that traditionally they would give me presents. He thought about that and then stated "Remember my Lightning McQueen Birthday? I gave presents to everyone." He's right. The party favors. Hmmm...now to come up with appropriate party favors for turning 38. Any ideas? Be nice...

Barber's Version of "Are We There Yet?"

The Good News: Barber loves preschool.

The Bad News: He is having difficulty waiting to go to preschool. He doesn't have to be there until 11:15AM. Jeter's bus picks him up at 8:00AM. Do you know how many times I have heard a question about when we are going to leave for preschool? At least over 20 but it feels like more than 200!

On a completely different note, if you are looking for a yummy new crock-pot recipe to try, check out today's post at Created & Called.

It's So (NOT) Hard To Say Good-bye

I know I haven't answered the burning question and it's long past tomorrow. I will. I promise. Just not today.

Today Barber started preschool. On the way I asked him how he wanted to say "good-bye". I am so not the Mommy that wants to ever embarrass her kids but they have to at least acknowledge me with a good-bye.

Me: So, how do you want to say good-bye? Do you want a high-five or sign I love you or do you want a hug? Whatever you want is fine with me.

Barber: Hmmm...I think that I want all of them.

Me: All of them? Are you sure? (This is so not what I was expecting)

Barber: Yes. I want all of them and I think I will tell you 'I love you' like I do when we say good-night.

Me: Okay. Whatever you want babe is a-ok with your mama.

Now...this is what really happened. He was so excited to be there that when it was time to say good-bye he turned long enough to give me a five, a quick hug while saying I love you and signing it at the same time. Then he was off and I left smiling.

I'm fine with one choice but if he wants to clump it all together like that I'll go with the flow. We'll see what tomorrow brings.

His verdict at the end of his day: Mrs. B is the best!

Awestruck!

Let me start at the beginning. Well, not all the way at the beginning but give you some background information.

The high school I used to teach at has an amazing preschool program. Jeter got in when he was 4 years old (students are selected via lottery) and loved it. Loved it. It was an amazing experience and I saw him grow and mature in so many ways. As Barber approached preschool age we prayed and believed that this was the only school for us to apply to. Applications were due April of this year. We submitted ours the first day. In May, we received a letter telling us that Barber was not selected.

What?!? There must be some mistake!?!

What do we do now? We knew that this was the only school that we had peace about applying to. We prayed again and left it in His hands. Quite simply, if God wanted Barber in that school then no man could prevent that from happening. Meanwhile, I had to get a game plan together for the two of us. Guess whose dining room is ready and set for preschool? I've got some centers set up and songs ready to be sung, coloring pages ready to be colored and worksheets set in place. I have themes picked out for the next year and lessons written ready to begin next week. No, I am not elementary ed certified and will never pretend to be but I do know how to teach (biology preferred of course).

Two days ago while I was driving home from running errands, Barber and I were singing "Days of the week" - it's a preschool song to the tune of the Addams Family. All of a sudden this question pops into my head.

What if you get a letter in the mail telling you that there is now an opening for Barber at the preschool?

I literally shook my head like the question would fall out of my ears and I wouldn't have to bother answering it. But I heard it again. So I responded. "Okay, God. I don't know if this is you or not. But I told you that if Barber was to go to that school then YOU were the one to open the door and if not then I know that I am to do what we've planned for at home. So, if I get a letter then that is a signal from you and therefore the answer would be 'yes'."

Guess what happened today?

We didn't get a letter. Even better. We received a phone call. It just so happens that today an opening occurred at the preschool and Barber's name was next on the list!

Guess who is going to preschool and meeting his new teacher next Thursday?!? Barber is so excited.

Me?

Awestruck.

How Are You Super Cool?

Jeter has completed his first week of second grade and has determined that his teacher, Miss W, is the best teacher ever!

The beginning of the year is never easy. New teacher. New classroom. New students. New responsibilities. Technically most of his classmates have been attending this school since Kindergarten but there are six classes per grade. As a result, Jeter only knew two students from his first grade class. Granted, some of the other boys and girls look familiar and he sort of knew some of them but as he puts it "I have to make new friends all over again."

One of the assignments he received was to complete a "me poster". It's due next Tuesday. A portion of the poster has the student identify three super cool facts about themselves. Jeter quickly filled in two and paused for the third, looking at me he said "if I went to a school that celebrated God then I would write 'follower of Jesus'." I told him he still could write that if he wanted to and we talked about what it is like to allow the love of Jesus to shine through us. I assured him that it isn't necessary to yell "I LOVE JESUS!" to everyone you see. Scripture doesn't depict Christ going through the cities declaring "Follow me! I'm the Messiah!". Rather, it was his actions that spoke volumes and ultimately changed lives.

The very next day he brought home an "All About Me" bag that was decorated at school. His assignment was to select three things from home that he could use to introduce himself to his new 'friends' in second grade. He proudly removed the bag from his folder and told me to look at the bag. On the front he drew and colored flames. Inside the flames he had written "The Word". I smiled. He said, I don't mind if anyone asks me about this and if they do I will tell them what it means. On the back he had colored a cross. I don't know if anyone noticed. What I do know is this - I am so proud of my son. At a young age, he has learned to not compromise who he is for the sake of others; allowing Christ to shine through him with simple, expressive acts.

Keep Burning Jeter!

Transaction In Time

Good Bye!

I love you!

Have a good day at school!

I'll miss you!

See you when you get home!

I love you again!

These sweet words left Barber's lips as he waved good-bye to Jeter and signed "I love you" again and again and again. Waving it so that Jeter could see. Thankfully Jeter wasn't too cool to give Barber a hug good-bye in front of all of his school buddies. I got a high-five.

I smiled.

At first glance, this summer seemed to be a "bust". My grandiose plans of summertime fun were minimized and altered by my injury and many times I mourned what I was unable to do with the boys to make this summer special. And yet, in the flurry of good-byes this morning, I realized the ONE thing that was most important to me happened -the bond between Barber and Jeter was strengthened. Their relationship grew and deepened to a new level and that is better than all the days we missed going to different parks or the projects that weren't completed. What they gained will never wear out, get thrown out, or be a forgotten activity.

My memories of this summer have been dominated at times by the nuisance of evolving from crutches with an air cast at all times to a brace sometimes, PT appointment that literally took me to the end of summer (last Friday), hours upon hours working on stuff for MIA - except when our hard drive fizzled and we were without a computer for a few weeks, Simms seemingly never-ending work hours, and lack of time and opportunity to get together with some dear friends. All that was eclipsed this morning by Barber's words to Jeter.

I am awestruck by the fact that this simple transaction in time could cause a shift in my thinking.

Here is what I am now going to put in the forefront of my memories for Summer 2008:

• The camaraderie that deepened between Jeter and Barber as they played pretend, created new inventions, built forts, played outside, rode bikes.
• The servant hood that developed in their lives and hearts as they got the ice pack for their Mommy or the pillow to lift my foot.
• The helpers they became when I first went food shopping again - even carrying all the groceries from the front stoop into the house and holding the door as I entered.
• They learned the meaning of family functioning as a team by living it.

No, it didn't happen the way I wanted it to but I do see how His ways are higher than my ways and He truly does work all things together for good. It is because of this that I still praise Him, call Him Father and trust Him completely.

Back-To-School Budget

Recently Natalie of Like I Was Saying... talked about the cost of Back-to-School shopping. I could not fathom that the average was $600! That means that some people spend less than that (which would be me) and some spend more (that is what average means of course).

She posted yesterday what her Back-to-School costs were this year which catalyzed the writing of this post.

I'm not a big "Back-to-School" shopper. I think partly because I shop ahead for the boys clothes anytime throughout the year...looking for sales. And I have to tell you when I'm fortunate enough to get a 30% off coupon at Kohls I definitely take advantage of that and use it on items that are already on sale or on clearance. I'm also fortunate that the boys were born 6 weeks apart in the calendar year so Barber uses all of Jeter's hand-me-downs. It is wonderful!

We're also blessed to not have to buy any school supplies. They are supplied by the school which means that I technically do pay for them via my taxes. I know once they enter Middle School there will be some supplies that we will need to purchase but that isn't until 5th grade. Meanwhile, providing a snack once a month is a-ok with me.

My one big expense this year was Jeter's lunch box. I don't like buying a new one each year - which is exactly what I have done since Kindergarten (Jeter is starting 2nd grade this year). Last year was Disney CARS themed and he is too old for that now even though it is in great condition. I understand that to be true (his outgrowing the theme) but it is still an irritant. I know spending $10 each year isn't going to break me financially but it is hard to justify the expense (in my brain anyway) when the old lunchbox is in near perfect condition.

I haven't had to buy a new backpack since Kindergarten and don't plan on doing so until he enters middle school - maybe. I was smart from the get-go on that one. I bought him the Solid Classmate Junior Backpack which was about $5 less than it is now and had it monogrammed. He absolutely loved it and has never considered getting another one. That could also be because I told him that it isn't going to happen until middle school (at least) and honestly, it isn't like this is going to go out of style.

I decided to apply the same logic to my lunch box dilemma and took advantage of the current deal at LandsEnd and bought him a lunch box that matches his backpack - and got it monogrammed as well. It's also wonderful to do this type of purchase when they are offering free shipping without a minimum purchase (unfortunately that deal has expired). So I spent $20 on the lunch box and another $7.50 on a stainless steel thermos (no design). Not too bad for back to school spending. Especially since I shouldn't have to buy either of those items for at least 3 years. Barber starts Kindergarten next year - and at that time we will invest in the backpack as well as the lunch box for his elementary experience.

Now just imagine how much someone else spent to make my amount average out to $600. I know that isn't exactly how it works but I can't help but think about that. It is just nuts!

First Grade Memories

Jeter's teacher had the students fill in a packet regarding their first grade memories. What a wonderful item for me to add to his school scrapbook! One of the pages was titled "My Wishes and Dreams". Below are the four prompts and his answers.

When I grow up I want to be...an all star soccer player and every one will know me.

I can't wait until I can...go back to school next year.

I always wanted to...be a man of Gods word and I am!

With my first paycheck I will buy...a house and a car.

The third one just blessed this mama's socks off! Wouldn't it be amazing if one simple paycheck could purchase a car and a house?!? Ahhhh the perspective of a seven year old is bliss.

Hopefully The Bug Stops Here

Even though all of you stayed away from my home, the bug has still come for a visit. I had to pick up Jeter from school today. He has a stomach virus. YUCH.

Jeter's Incredible Equation

Simms says that he gets this from me but I know that I wasn't doing this at the ripe old age of six!

10x40-100-100-200+10+10+10+10+100-140+10+1+9+2+8+10+8+1+1+9-13+2=48

Last night was our parent teacher conference at Jeter's school. Apparently everyday they do "Incredible Equations" in class. The teacher gives them the answer and the students come up with the equation. This was his equation on Monday. She saved it so we could see it.

Then this morning as I was drying my hair Jeter says "Mom I know what (200+31)x3 is...it is 693." To which I said "Yes, you're right. Now go get dressed for school."

Jeter you are priceless - indeed a gift from God.

"I A First Grader Tonight!"

What Barber means by that statement is that we visited Jeter's class yesterday afternoon.

His first grade has been studying a lot about pumpkins this season. This week they learned about the pumpkin life cycle (can I tell you again how much I love Jeter's teacher!). They also adopted "baby" pumpkins. Yesterday I brought in a snack (the pumpkin chocolate chip muffins) and Barber joined me. The class was quite busy with their stations - creating birth certificates for the baby pumpkins (including a print of its bottom) and artistically making the life cycles. With the teachers invitation, Barber joined Jeter in his activities (observing Jeter...not participating) and I helped at one of the stations.

After the stations were complete, Barber and I joined the class in the fire drill (so cute seeing a 3-1/2 year old walking in line with the other students holding his hand in the "fox ears" position), snack time, some time outside and then packing up to go home. It was so wonderful to see him handle himself so well in the classroom. I was so proud of him!

He has told me he is ready to going to school. I explained that next year he will go to pre-school; this year he is home with mommy. Of course he thinks that he is ready for first grade NOW because you know, in first grade there is a carpet with a "B" on it and that is for him since his name starts with that letter and that is where he sits. Completely logical you know. Meanwhile, I know that Kindergarten has the same carpet...maybe pre-school will too. Funny little man.