I Still Love You...I Still Need You...

This is where my heart is right now. Valentines Day is Monday. This is the same day as my Dad's first chemo treatment. Lots of emotions yet, amidst it all, my spirit declares the verse of this song

No matter what, I’m gonna love You
No matter what I’m gonna need You
I know that You can find a way to keep me from the pain
But if not, if not, I’ll trust You no matter what, no matter what

I especially love this video because of the Bible verses that are included. Huge encouragement.

Happy Birthday Barber

My little Barber - he's not so little anymore. Today he is 6 years old. How did that happen?

One of the things that I enjoy as his mama is getting to know this little man.

There are things about his personality that I saw in the first year of his life that are still present. And yet there are new facets that have developed or grown stronger over the last year.

Joy. Can you say exuberant joy? He is joyful and he brings joy to me. Not every minute of every day - there are growing pains. But...when I think of my Barber I can't help but smile and see his smiling face in my minds eye and hear his giggle.

Love. This boy loves his family. Hugs and kisses abound and we still have our secret handshake. He is definitely independent and likes to do things on his own - by himself. But then, in his own way - loud and obvious or quiet and thoughtful - he makes sure that you know he loves you and needs you and enjoys spending time with you. He may snuggle up and ask me to read a book to him - or better yet, he reads one to me. He might hand me a flower just because he wants me to know that I am special. His favorite are the buds from the Bleeding Hearts that we have in the front yard.

Intensity. It is seen when he is playing t-ball or soccer on an organized team. This intensity is also apparent when he is working on a project for school or building something or playing the Wii. Whether he is working or playing, there is an intensity about him. Not in a bad way either - he just puts everything he's got into whatever he is doing. 100% all of the time. The difficulty is when he is so focused that he forgets that Mommy and Daddy trump anything that he is doing...

Opinionated. One thing that Barber has never lacked is his opinion. He has no problem with telling me whether he likes my hair or not, an outfit, how something smells, etc. He started picking out his own clothes when he was two years old. He is sensitive to others and their feelings but he doesn't allow that to control what his likes and dislikes are. It seems like he was born knowing who he is, what he likes, etc.

Humorous. This child makes me laugh. Genuinely laugh. What he says, how he says it, the faces he makes...I can't quite put my finger on it. He just has an excellent sense of humor and sometimes it happens when we least expect it. For example, Simms just put a chain on our gate door this past weekend (so it can be opened from the outside when it is unlocked). A few hours later he discovered that it was off!?! While we were eating dinner he asked the boys about it. Barber ended up telling us this story of how he was trying to get into the backyard and was struggling with the chain until he "had enough of that" and pulled it off and threw it out. May not sound funny now but Simms and I giggled quite a bit over this incident.

Inquisitive. Barber definitely has the making of an investigator. His Kindergarten teacher refers to him as a little scientist. He likes to figure things out and is very tactile. A little too much at times for my liking. I know it is there for a reason - I'm still teaching him how to think of the consequences before he moves forward on one of his ideas. I'm praying this lesson is learned sooner than later.

Imagination. One moment he is a superhero until he is a police officer or a spy or a pirate or a knight...the list is truly endless. The one theme that is seen throughout is that there is adventure involved in the story line he creates and he is ultimately the hero that saves the day.

Charmer. He doesn't know this...yet. Hopefully it stays that way as long as possible. This coupled with any and all of the above is why this mama spends a lot of time praying. Where did he get this attribute? Do you know my husband / his Daddy? Need I say more? Already - in Kindergarten, there are little girls that give him the "eyes". He isn't seeing it but I do when I visit him at school. There is one girl in particular. He has known her since preschool and this past week he told me she is his girlfriend. I corrected him "no...she is a friend who happens to be a girl". His response? "I know. That's what I said. She is my girlfriend". Ugh.

Oh my sweet Barber - you are truly a gift, a priceless treasure. I'm so blessed to have you call me Mommy / Mom / Mama and I will always love you no matter what.

White-based Sweater with Navy, Maroon and Hunter Green Stripes

That's what Simms wore - when he told me that he liked me - standing in the stairwell of the girls dorm my junior year of college. That was almost 1-1/2 years after we met in Zoology Lab. I have to be honest, I don't remember what he wore that night in lab when we first met. I do remember his smile and that he made me laugh and I thought that maybe he could become a good friend...maybe more...

So why am I telling you this? Two of my cousins are getting married this fall...need I say more?

Mickey from Long Island is like a sister to me. She keeps me young and I've always loved our late night talks...although it's getting a little harder to bounce back the next day. She asked Simms and I to sing at her wedding. We are so honored. I love singing with Simms - haven't done it for awhile but it really is fun for me. Is fun the right word? Anyway...what makes it even more fun (I don't care - I'm using it again) is the song we get to sing. It's by Boys Like Girls, titled Two Is Better Than One and the version is the one they did with Taylor Swift. Can I tell you how thrilled I am for the alto part?!? Love it!

I tried to embed it...but I'm not allowed, so here is the youtube link. Lyrics are below.

Two Is Better Than One by Boys Like Girls

I remember what you wore on the first day
You came into my life and I thought
"Hey, you know, this could be something"
'Cause everything you do and words you say
You know that it all takes my breath away
And now I'm left with nothing

Chorus:
So maybe it's true
That I can't live without you
And maybe two is better than one
But there's so much time
To figure out the best of my life
And you've already got me coming undone
And I'm thinking two is better than one

I remember every look upon your face
The way you roll your eyes
The way you taste
You make it hard for breathing
'Cause when I close my eyes and drift away
I think of you and everything's okay
I'm finally now believing

(Chorus)

I remember what you wore on the first day
You came into my life and I thought "Hey"

(Chorus)

I know we're singing it to/for our cousin(s) - he will be our cousin once their married. We love having a family that grows - more love to go around. At the same time these words still apply to us even after 16+ years of marriage.

Maybe I'm a sap but it could be difficult to sing this, looking into Simms eyes and not cry or get choked up. Thankfully we have time to practice!

Lucky?

Simms has introduced me to Jason Mraz and I like his jazzy/pop style. Lucky is one of my favorite songs...I have fun singing it with Simms and I mean every word. He truly is my best friend and I am very lucky blessed to be in love with him...more and more every day.

Lucky by Jason Mraz

Somebody Loves Me!

Isn't that simply beautiful? Papa came to visit us and watch the boys play baseball. He also surprised me with a beautiful boquet of roses as an early Mother's Day gift. (Late posting...I know)

I just had to take some pictures. I do love flowers. I don't like that they don't last forever.

My countertop was graced by these beauties for days!

Pardon My Absence...

Here are a few reasons why you haven't heard from me for awhile...

#1 - Barbados

#2 - St. Lucia

#3 - Antigua

#4 - St. Maartan

#5 - St. Thomas

Celebrating our 15th Anniversary with the best, most relaxing, adventurous cruise ever!

Did Someone Say Dark Chocolate?

Simms and I have never gone crazy over Valentine's Day. I'd hypothesize that it's because our Anniversary (both when we started dating and when we got married) is in January and we've already celebrated how much we love each other. It kind of makes February 14th a day to say "oh yeah, by the way, just in case you've forgotten, I love you again!" Don't get me wrong - we still let each other know how much we love them but we've never established a tradition for Valentine's Day. Throughout the years cards have been given, a love note tucked in his lunch, e-cards sent online, dinner out or in but not cooked by me (now that's a huge gift!). You get the point. Last year I gave Simms a chocolate my wife rocks tee and myself a chocolate my husband rocks tee which can be purchased at from*me tees. He loved it and wears it often. I liked that I was giving him chocolate without the calories!!!



For our anniversary this year, we treated ourselves to the two shall become one tees - his and hers.

Since we did that a couple of weeks ago, I didn't know what I was going to do this year for Valentine's Day until I saw the debut of the new black metro tees. Can you tell we like to live the tag line celebrate your spouse in style?

I appreciate being able to give Simms a gift that is thoughtful, loving and will last long after the flowers have wilted and the candy has gone to your waist or hips. LOL. I will probably still leave a love note in his lunch and we'll go out to eat but since we are both watching our calories, this year, the black metro tee is my dark chocolate.

What if you aren't a chocolate kind of gal? No problem. From*me tees has a large selection for both men and women and there is even a Winter Sale going on right now! While you are checking the site out, you may want to note that the company has recently expanded their line to include selections for children and babies. My boys were thrilled to receive their daddy rocks (mommy's right) tees at Christmas and have already told me that they want the mommy rocks (daddy's right) tee as well.

Regardless of what you choose to do this year, take time to say I love you and remember to say it on the days that lead up to the 14th as well as those that follow!

Hand In Hand

15 years.

Sounds like a long time and yet in a flash I can picture standing at the altar once again - looking into the eyes of my beloved Simms. I still remember our vows and a portion of the words we spoke when our rings were given to one another.

...as this circle has no end, neither shall my love.

Powerful words that signify the promise in our hearts as we began to walk through life together, hand in hand. Those hands are a bit more weathered and I know my nails are not as nicely manicured but that statement still rings true. Our love has deepened and grown stronger, rooted in the One who loves us.

I still love to look into Simms eyes and see the sparkle of his smile, the warmth of his love and the sensitivity of his heart.

Happy Anniversary Simms! We've definitely hiked up mountains and journeyed through valleys but I would not want it any other way. I love you and look forward to continuing our journey together, hand in hand.

If Sacrifice Was a Color, What Would It Be?

Picture one task that you truly despise. Something that if possible, you would never ever ever purposefully participate in. Do you have something in mind? Now understand this - this is how my beloved Simms feels about paint - not as in color but rather the process of application of said color.

We moved into our house in 1997. The home was only two years old and the walls were still covered with flat white construction paint. I'm a color girl. I love the show Color Splash on HGTV (as well as many others - anyone else a Design Star fan?). While I appreciate all the warm hues, my decorating taste seems to lean toward the cool tones. Needless to say, the walls were screaming for some color and character and over the last 11+ years I have been quite busy with paint. Simms is very happy to see the project complete and desires to be part of the planning process - he likes design, he just isn't a fan of the process through which it happens especially if paint is involved.

In the last 11+ years, Simms has very successfully avoided paint. He has gladly helped pick out colors - and he's even helped me with taping off the room (thank you!) - but his involvement typically ends there. He did help when we worked on our Master Bedroom - which was our first real project in 1997. I think that sealed the deal for his dislike of paint. He also helped paint the crown molding for our dining room in 2003. It is now 2008 and although my mom helped a bunch - she also is housing family this weekend and needs to take care of details in her own home.

Yesterday's plan was to paint the top and bottom of the final wall. I completed the bottom portion with the chocolate brown and Simms was going to complete the top in the evening. That was before we knew he was going to put in a 12-hour day at work. I was ready to improvise - thinking I could paint the middle section today and then tonight Simms could paint the top. I shared this with him and he tiredly nodded his agreement. Then at 10:30PM (not even 2 hours after he got home) he surprised me and asked "So, you ready to go upstairs and paint?" What? Now? Are you kidding me?

He wasn't. His concern was what tomorrow would bring - the unknown hours of his workday. So we spent an hour edging and rolling paint on the top portion of the final wall. He did it without verbally complaining but his nonverbals told me what a loving sacrifice it was. What a funny picture we were at 11:30 last night. Me with a smile of glee at seeing my vision for the room getting one step closer to completion while Simms humored me with an almost painful smirk and a "Hooray. It's done." Well, his portion of the paint is done. I'll finish this phase tomorrow but I'm not even near "done". There's woodwork and furniture to be painted, a curtain rod to purchase, canvases to paint, frames to purchase and hang, etc. etc. etc.

He Loves Me! He Loves Me A Lot!

He loves me! He loves me a lot!

Am I wearing my From Me Tees Daisy Tee? Nope, not today. But maybe I should.

As you can imagine (and have been reading) life at our corner has been anything but normal. My ankle aside, this is Simms busiest time of year at work - averaging 10-12 hour workdays (with one 14 hour thrown in there just for kicks!).

And you know what this amazing man did for me today?

No? Well let me tell you then.

Simms had to leave early for work this morning - so he was out of the house before I was out of bed. When I finally got downstairs (fully dressed and ready for the day...not wanting a repeat of my disheveled self) what did I find waiting for me? 16 oz of freshly brewed coffee awaiting me in my favorite travel mug. No I wasn't going anywhere this morning (I have PT this afternoon) but the mug kept the coffee at a great temperature. All I had to do was add my creamer and enjoy.

I've always loved and appreciated the little things. I never was one that desired to be given flowers or jewelry. Granted it's nice (and I am thrilled when Simms chooses to bless me with either) but flowers die and jewelry doesn't typically fit our budget. Thankfully I have a husband who knows what I like and takes time to show me he loves me in the simple everyday acts of life.

I love you Simms! I love you a lot!

What's Love Got to Do With It?

Footprints

One night I had a dream. I was walking along the beach with the Lord, and across the skies flashed scenes from my life. In each scene I noticed two sets of footprints in the sand. One was mine, and one was the Lords. When the last scene of my life appeared before me, I looked back at the footprints in the sand, and to my surprise, I noticed that many times along the path of my life there was only one set of footprints. And I noticed that it was at the lowest and saddest times in my life. I asked the Lord about it: "Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you, you would walk with me all the way. But I notice that during the most troublesome times of my life there is only one set of footprints. I don't understand why you left my side when I needed you most." The Lord said: "My precious child, I never left you during your time of trial. Where you see only one set of footprints, I was carrying you."

Valentine's Day. If you recall, I have mixed emotions about the day. Today, my boys came downstairs to find a yummy nugget of "love" waiting for them on the kitchen table. Is my love for them really equal to a handfull of chocolate covered peanut butter hearts? No way! But, on a day where love is celebrated (and yet still greatly misunderstood in this world), I believe it is important for them to receive a special something from their Mama. Another reminder that they are unconditionally loved. I know I needed it from my Daddy.

Barber downed his breakfast as soon as he could so that he could have one of his special treats. Jeter is saving them for later. He really wanted one but I reminded him that his class is having a party today and he is certain to have a treat or two at school.

Happy Valentines Day! May you truly know the unconditional love of our Father.