Praying When You Don't Know the "Why's" or the "How's"

My parents became Christians when I was around 2 years old. I don't remember life without God. My Mom and Dad prayed with us and for us. When I would come home from school, upset about something or someone, my mom would let me tell her and then she would pray with me. I always felt better afterwards...even when things didn't seem to be better - somehow, since we now told God about it, it was ok in my world. Whenever I was sick I always wanted my Dad to pray for me and after he did, everything seemed better. Their prayers helped to remind me how safe I was in my Father's arms and what a Comforter He is.

I know that they both prayed for years regarding mine and my sister's future husbands - and we know that we and our families are blessed as a result. Now I am aware of how they prayed for me when I was completely unaware and most likely when I needed it the most.

Now I am the mom. I am the one that is praying with my boys and teaching them how to talk to God. I am the one that is already praying for their future brides and extended family. I am the one praying that they walk in the fullness of what God has called them to and created them to be. I am the one that prays with them when they are sick or have a bad dream, hurt themselves, etc. I am also the one that prays for them when they don't even know it...

One of the times that I pray with Jeter is on our walk to the bus stop. We pray for his day, his teacher, his classmates, etc. Sometimes, I also pray for him on my walk home after the bus has driven him off to the next stop. Today was one of those days. I began praying as usual...that God would be with him on the bus, in the classroom, during Art (his special today), at lunch and on the playground. That he would strengthen the angels that guard and protect him - spirit, soul, mind and body...then I just felt something in my gut that today was different. I needed to pray more. But what about? I felt the need to pray this when I was praying for protection...that doesn't sit too well with the mommy. This causes me to think "nobody, NO-BODY better mess with my Jeter!!!" Not like my thoughts are going to stop anything but if anyone was near me I am sure they would have heard!!! What was I to do? What were my options? Really just one: pray and leave it in His hands. How? Like this "Ok, Lord, something is different about today and I don't know what it is but YOU do so please intervene on behalf of my son and be there for him. I trust you" That was it - and of course praying throughout the day as He prompted me and the way He prompted me to.

As you can imagine, when Jeter got off the bus, I was glad to see he was visibly ok. He was a bit grumpy but he was still getting over some kind of virus (had a fever Tuesday night, home yesterday and then back to school today b/c he was fever free for 24 hours). I asked him my various questions - I change them daily...instead of "what did you do today?" I will ask some of the following: What was your favorite activity today? What center did you enjoy today? What didn't you like today? Did anything make you feel sad today? How was art/music/gym/library? What did you do for Kid Writing? That's just a sampling. I have learned with Jeter that if I ask a specific question, I am answered with specifics. Likewise, if I ask him how his day was, he responds "good". I like specifics. Back to today...I asked my questions and got decent answers but not really specific. I could tell something was bothering him and he didn't really feel like talking. So I waited. Not easy but I did it. About 2 hours later, Jeter walked out of the bathroom into the kitchen where I was finalizing dinner and without any prompting on my end, he started telling me about an incident at recess today. It involved some boys who seemed to think that it would be fun to pretend to play with Jeter and his 3 friends and then proceed to shove them to the ground and kick at their legs. Hello!?!?! This is so not ok with the mommy. (Can you hear the New Yorker in me?!?!?) Of course I calmly asked the parental questions and use this as a learning opportunity to the best of my ability. Inside? I was sooooooooooooooo thankful that Jeter was ok - and in my spirit I knew that this is why I was praying today. He knew. I didn't. And this fact does not scare me. This incident has given me such peace. Crazy. I know. If I wasn't certain before, I now know that I can rest regarding the safety of my boys. They are protected by His hand. I can trust Him fully and completely. My prayers for them will not be the result of fear but rather due to His prompting...even when I don't know the why's...especially when I don't even know how - He will show me.