My Agenda or HIS Objective?

"For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places." Ephesians 6:12

I know I usually write about the message we heard on Sunday but I was doing pagers on for the children's ministry and my family was home sick. Today I am going to write about what we have been walking through the last few days and how God has helped us through it.

Recently (and I am going to leave out the detail) my son Jeter was accused of behavior that is not typical of him. For anyone and everyone that knows Jeter, "aggressive" is not an adjective that would be used to describe him (although Simms might appreciate the acquisition of such a trait while Jeter is on the soccer field...in a positive, competitive way of course). I was fully prepared to discipline Jeter for this behavior but part of our "corrective process" requires the child to know and admit what they did that was wrong. If they don't understand why they are being corrected, then they can't make changes in their behavior and that would defeat the whole purpose! So in my attempt to gather enough evidence to convict my son of his wrongdoing (FYI - moms and dads are multitalented and in this case I utilized attributes of an investigative lawyer/reporter and at times there were hints of good cop/bad cop). Regardless, what I uncovered was information that supported my sons' claim of innocence! Ugh. I cannot even describe the sickening feeling in my stomach for the interrogation that I put Jeter through for over 20 minutes...and then the thought that it was because of a claim made by someone, who has some authority but in the big picture does not really know my son. I was ill.

I don't recall my parents ever apologizing for correcting me so I had nothing to go by...no example to follow. I prayed a quick prayer (actually my mom was here and so she is the one that prayed for me out loud while I silently screamed in agony) and asked God to give me the words and the grace and the mercy that I needed. That he would turn what the enemy intended for evil to good.

He is faithful. My conversation with Jeter went well. Afterwards, I kept imploring God why this was allowed to happen? What good could possibly come out of this? It didn't make sense to me...no matter how I analyzed it (and trust me, I have been known to overanalyze - at least one or two times anyway). Finally, one of my dear friends/sisters, who is also an analyzer, told me to do two things: 1. stop analyzing and 2. ask God for His purpose to be clear. Ok...I was going to do that.

She was so right.

Yesterday, while doing the pagers, God reminded me of the above verse. I also thought of the verse

"And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose" Romans 8:28.

So these were my thoughts that followed: We qualify. No, we are not perfect but our hearts are right and therefore this promise is ours. Then I began to analyze (just a little bit) and asked what the good is that has come out of this? Here is what I came up with:

• Draw closer as a family
• Draw closer to God
• See more of His fruit in our lives - Jeter is making sure that he tells us the truth about anything and everything - and he knows that it is safe to do so.
• There has been a new level of trust and unity established in our family

That isn't enough for me though. My next question is where do we go from here? The following is what resulted from that question:

• Draw even closer / go even deeper
• Don't turn back or give in
• Stand on the protection that He provides and promises over us.
• Keep eyes/focus on Him and not the circumstances and to wait expectantly for His directive and then obey!

Good enough. But I knew that I needed to talk to this individual about the claim that was made against my son. Ugh! My mind was heavy all weekend. Don't get me wrong - I definitely don't shy away from confrontation. That is not something I have a problem with. But I wanted to make sure that my talking with this individual did not complete my agenda. My flesh would want to use my words/reason/intellect/etc. to make the individual feel smaller than a gnat (or "g-nat" as the guard in the Veggietales Esther would say). But then I am reminded of what we have been challenged with at church - to Honor All. So my hearts cry was that I would know what His objective was regarding the conversation that I was to have with this individual and that it is that which would be accomplished. Not easy. Not easy. But I am here to write that I believe that God gave me two specific things that I needed to discuss with the individual and I did. I obeyed. Did the individual admit to making a mistake? No. Did the individual apologize for the claim? No. Was the purpose of God fulfilled? I believe the answer to that is yes...and only because of the PEACE that is in my heart.